boycotts

You should probably only try to boycott things that matter.  Here is a quick spectrum:

10! -- Not letting black folks ride busses like "regular folks" -- [Totally worth a boycott]
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7 -- Women making about $0.75 to every man's $1, for equal positions -- [Probably worth more, but, you know this is pretty much every company.  Who ya gunna boycott? A man's gotta eat.]
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5 -- Arrested Development not on air. Two and Half Men on air. --  [I never, EVER watch CBS, 'cept for SEC football]
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1 -- Boycotts aimed around silly teenage style dick jokes. -- [Actually, works as a reverse boycott in which your silly protestations actually HELP drive the companies marketing. "Look, kids! Conservative church ladies don't like it!?! Aren't we naughty?"]

Congrats on brilliant marketing, unilever.  I haven't bought your crappy ice cream in years.  I will now.

http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2011/09/21/140662704/stop-schweddy-balls-effort-begins

welcome to the internet

once upon a time a man with peculiar tastes, such as my own, was an island unto himself.  now, thanks to the internet, a man can join his brethren in the positively insane.

voila!

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/its-decorative-gourd-season-motherfuckers

Family Time

5 things that probably SHOULDN'T come in "family size" packaging

1. Tampons
2. Petroleum Jelly
3. Clearasil
4. Oreos
5. Flunitrazepam

Advice For NY -- Living your best life in the big shitty

* If you own a vehicle that makes noise when you back up, you need to be less cavalier about backing up.

* Once upon a time, the mayor proposed a car alarm ban in NYC.  I didn't think this was quite right.  Rather than criminalize car alarms, I felt he should simply DE-criminalize taking baseball bats to cars with car alarms.

* Seriously, you smell.  None of your friends has the heart to say it.  But you do.

* Just the thought of trying to orchestrate some travel outside your borders gave me stress.  I canceled said travel as a result.  You should think about being less needy.

taxes.

I know you've heard otherwise.  But taxes.  Really pretty low.

1930 - 1980

Historical marginal income tax rates for Married Filing Jointly at stated income levels.^[3]

Year	$10,001	$20,001	$60,001	$100,001	$250,001
1930	6%	10%	21%	25%	25%
1932	10%	16%	36%	56%	58%
1934	11%	19%	37%	56%	58%
1936	11%	19%	39%	62%	68%
1938	11%	19%	39%	62%	68%
1940	14%	28%	51%	62%	68%
1942	38%	55%	75%	85%	88%
1944	41%	59%	81%	92%	94%
1946	38%	56%	78%	89%	91%
1948	38%	56%	78%	89%	91%
1950	38%	56%	78%	89%	91%
1952	42%	62%	80%	90%	92%
1954	38%	56%	78%	89%	91%
1956	26%	38%	62%	75%	89%
1958	26%	38%	62%	75%	89%
1960	26%	38%	62%	75%	89%
1962	26%	38%	62%	75%	89%
1964	23%	34%	56%	66%	76%
1966 - 1976	22%	32%	53%	62%	70%
1980	18%	24%	54%	59%	70%

[edit]

And --

Year 2011 income brackets and tax rates

Marginal Tax Rate[6]	Single	Married Filing Jointly or Qualified Widow(er)	Married Filing Separately	Head of Household
10%	$0 – $8,500	$0 – $17,000	$0 – $8,500	$0 – $12,150
15%	$8,501 – $34,500	$17,001 – $69,000	$8,501 – $34,500	$12,150 – $46,250
25%	$34,501 – $83,600	$69,001 – $139,350	$34,501 – $69,675	$46,250 – $119,400
28%	$83,601 – $174,400	$139,351 – $212,300	$69,675 – $106,150	$119,401 – $193,350
33%	$174,401 – $379,150	$212,301 – $379,150	$106,151 – $189,575	$193,350 - $379,150
35%	$379,151+	$379,651+	$189,576+	$379,151+

how do you make money?

Mike Lupica is famous.  The NY Daily News pays him money to write about Yankees baseball.

He turns things like this out --

So Cashman, who has given Yankee fans Sabathia in the last 10 years and a lot of guys named Burnett and Kevin Brown and Randy Johnson and Javy (Grand Slam) Vazquez and Jaret Wright - guys who make you stand and cheer when they're NOT giving up five runs a game - talked about re-arming the Yankees, you bet. What he really meant that night when he talked about pitching was Cliff Lee, whom he was supposed to money-whip into coming to New York.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/yankees/2011/08/28/2011-08-28_yankees_fans_have_gm_brian_cashman_to_blame_for_giving_them_aj_burnett_and_his_s.html#ixzz1WR3mjCcK

 1. Cashman has given Yankee fans a lot of guys named ...

Um.  By my math he has only given Yankee fans one each of these guys, respectively.

2. Guys who make you cheer when they're NOT giving up five runs a game.

Once again. UM! Who the fuck cheers WHEN anyone is giving up five runs a game?

3.  The Yankee pitching staff is amazingly awesome.  It's strange, but very true.  They have given up only 525 runs.  They play the Red Sox, who have scored the second most runs in baseball this season, 19 times.  This is the 5th best clip in the league.  Also keep in mind that they score an insane amount of runs; the best in the league, in fact.

Sigh.  This is entirely too common.  That some dip-shit can rant and rail that something is so, when it is is actually very different.

I just wish we stopped paying them money and attention. NotGraphs does an amazing job at reducing foolish writing into glib sentences.  You should read them and make THEM famous and pay THEM money.

weight: a timberman race report

In the course of one year I have lost approximately 30 lbs.  There are, essentially, two ways to look at this ...

1. I am a hyper dedicated badass.  There are few problems that have ever been laid before me that I have not risen, incredibly, to meet.  I am a surgical master applicator of self discipline and will power.

2. Jesus, you stupid, lazy, fat bastard! Why, why WHY! did it take you four feckin' years of triathlon-ing (including one pretty freaking mediocre ironman) to drop those lbs?


This race report comes to you through those alternating lenses of self perspective.  Enjoy.